Nigel
During the nineties, Jay was a member of our squash team that represented the Inland Revenue in the Sussex Business League. The team was promoted from the third division to the first division in successive years resulting in a close knit team spirit among the players.
Jay was a vibrant and key member of the team during that time and normally represented the team at first string. Once the team had attained first division status, we found ourselves a little out of depth in as much as we were regularly playing against high ranked County players. Unperturbed, we soldiered on, improving as we regulary lost to technically better opponents. In that Jay was our highest ranked player, he bore the brunt of this disparity in standards and often drew on his fitness and natural sporting talent to perform heroically in doggedly hanging in through determination and resolve to frustrate and torment his highly skilled opponents.
Within a such a cauldron of highly competitive activity you get to know your fellow team members on a level that may, arguably, be compared to how soldiers formed bonds of friendship in the trenches. Thus I came to know Jay as a brave, intense, clever and witty friend. Jay enjoyed life and was happy when those around him were happy. He would challenge convention in a charming manner and lived his life with a moral fibre that was inspirational.
Life changes, and Jay moved on to a more challengingand rewarding career in London. The last time I saw Jay was in the Worthing shopping precinct on a cold, wet Saturday afternoon. His mind was elsewhere as he wandered through the throng of shoppers with a knapsack on his back. We chatted for a few minutes and he told me he was happy with his new venture in London but still adjusting to spending more time away from his young family due to work commitments.
Whether the tragic death of Jay was racially motivated or just a wanton act of violence, I do not know. What I do know is that those responsible should be bought to justice as there is no place in a civilised society for such behaviour.
Archie
Jay and I worked together for a few short years in the Inland Revenue Stamp Office Shares Unit in Worthing when I was a manager there; in that brief time I got to know him very well. Jay was always proud of his work and considered it almost a self-portrait, autographing everything he did with excellence.
His easy going and persuasive nature endeared him to all who worked with him because he always looked for the best in people and brought it to the fore. But there was one thing he would never budge on, his food! I think it is fair to say that Jay was something of a gourmet when it came to his love of oriental cuisine. When we made one of our weekly work visits to London or had to stay the night in some otherpart of the country on business, Jay was only ever prepared to eat Indian or Chinese food. That was the extent of the compromise; we could have one or the other! If I tell you he is the only man ever to have persuaded an entire office in the Inland Revenue that the Christmas meal should be in a Thai restaurant you will know what I mean about his powers of persuasion.
Whenever I think of Jay I remember how he loved the one word retort to some story or happy news saying "Alright" or "Wicked" or "Serious" as if inwardly digesting the extent of what we had just talked about. He didn't speak to me very often about his family, but when he did, his pride and love for them were obvious. I miss Jay, my colleague and my friend.